A shopping addiction is not necessarily what it seems. To an observer, it simply seems like compulsive, frivolous behavior; a person extending their resources beyond their means. These things are part of a shopping addiction, but the underlying cause of a shopping addiction is a feeling of emptiness. This feeling of emptiness may have come from a number of adverse stimuli, but it is always something that has worked its way into a person’s subconsciousness and has found a place to fester there. A person acting out in a shopping addiction does not love buying things as much as they think they do. What they like is the temporary feeling of filling the hole inside them.

Because of the adverse experience or experiences the shopping addict went through, they were thrown off course for a chance at good mental health. Negative events in a person’s life, particularly in their early developmental years, need to be dealt with right away by a responsible party, usually the person’s parents. The young person who went through the adverse experience needs help processing it by a parent or a counselor so that they do not develop unhealthy thought or behavior patterns. Sadly, the need for this is often overlooked and the young person veers off from good mental health. This type of thing can happen repeatedly to a person, twisting and bending their mental health ever further. So what is a mere annoyance to someone observing a shopping addict, is actually a deeply ingrained, troubled behavior on the part of the addict.

A shopping addiction is simply a way that a person seeks to bring themselves comfort. Typically, they have long lost conscious touch with what initially caused their addiction and are simply acting on instinct. They have no intention of frustrating the people in their lives or of damaging their personal finances or of cluttering up their space. All they know is that shopping temporarily relieves the burning ache of emptiness so they return to it again and again and again.

One particularly dangerous trap that compulsive shoppers fall into is one that is seen throughout all addictions, be it food addictions, sex addictions, alcohol addictions or drug addictions. This trap is the lie that an addict tells themselves about why they are once again indulging in their harmful behavior. The excuse is this: tomorrow is a better day for me to quit my addiction. The problem with this logic is that it inevitably becomes a pattern. Promising yourself that you will change your ways in the days to come is a very comforting, complacent mental space to put yourself in. It gives you reassurance that you are not an addict, you are simply waiting for the right circumstances to arise that will enable you to change your lifestyle. While this may feel like a solution, it is actually a form of destruction.

Those who fall victim to this logic will inevitably fall into destructive behavior. A person who tells themselves they will change in the future is also subconsciously excusing their present behavior, as well as making it worse. It is inevitable to reason that, because you have plans to quit your harmful behavior tomorrow, it is justifiable to indulge in it today. This reasoning is the epitome of laziness and complacency, yet we are all familiar with it. It is important to guard yourself against this type of thinking, whether its a shopping addiction you struggle with or some other type of addiction. This thinking alone can prove extremely destructive to your life because it makes the damage done by your addiction very significant.

It does not matter when you take the steps to control your addiction; it will always come with some discomfort and a great deal of resistance from your longing for instant gratification. It will always be work and it will always be challenging. However, it will also get easier with time until, eventually, you will approach your addiction with an entirely different attitude, typically one that is amazed at how controlled you were by your addiction. Once you accept this reality with maturity and grace, you can begin to work with it, and you can quit putting your recovery off until tomorrow.